1.  When you're 83, you do what you want.
Arizona. An elderly man took a golf cart for a joyride on the interstate. There he is going down the freeway right in the middle of traffic. Police stopped him. They say he wasn't impaired. He knew what he was doing.

2. New use for underwear.
Texas. A man broke into a landscaping business. He used underwear as a mask. Hopefully, it was clean. Police are looking for him. 

3. Montreal's tomato thief was the mailman. 
A woman growing tomatoes outside her apartment until the mailman starts chomping down. Over the course of several days, he ate them all. The woman wondering where her tomatoes went. Then she saw her neighbor's surveillance video. The woman's a little put out but she says if he brings her a strawberry pie, all will be forgiven.